An update

I was really hoping I wouldn’t have to make any posts. However …

I’m Robin, the best friend Kristina mentioned a few days ago. Although we didn’t work this out in advance, it occurred to me today that I should give an update on Monday’s events.

As Kristina anticipated, the judge gave her the full six-month jail sentence, minus two days for time served. It took all damn day with those of us who couldn’t be with her texting one another in fits of anxiety and hope, until D. got in touch with the outcome.

He said she was strong while reading her statement in court. Having been friends for nearly 14 years, since she was an undergrad, I know how deep her fear of public speaking goes. To be able to stand in court and read her statement … I am in awe of her.

As Kristina mentioned previously, D. will be manning an email address for mass updates and Paypal donations. I will be posting updates here as she snail mails them to me.

This will most likely be the only post I make that’s not a transcription of Kristina’s words, as it would be so, so, so easy for me to use this as a platform for the grief I’m experiencing. It’s there every single time I reach for my phone to text her. It was there all afternoon when I walked into a video shoot by a member of the Flaming Lips at a record store. How can I possibly experience something of that level of fantastic weirdness without sharing it with Kristina? If she doesn’t know, did it even really happen? It doesn’t feel like it.

She didn’t give me the URL for her blog until two months ago. Today was the first time I read it. At the time I told her I wasn’t going to read it because I wanted her to have this private space, and I knew she’d share with me the things she wanted me to know. Tonight, I scrolled through, read some posts, and marveled at what a truly wonderful person she is. I always knew this. Even when I ended our friendship for a chunk of a year because I couldn’t handle the effects of her drinking while trying to manage my own postpartum depression. I knew she was still so good, right down to her core. That’s never been more clear to me than it is now.

But you’re not here to read my shit, and this is the last of it I’ll dump. The support Kristina’s found through the sober blogging community has meant the world to her. It’s given her that boost that only true empathy can provide. I’m honored that she asked me to update her blog while she’s away.

We got through May, 2013. We’ll get through this.

Kristina and me on my 40th birthday.

Kristina and me on my 40th birthday.

Sneaking into a Wilco sound check.

Sneaking into a Wilco sound check.

Two of my very favorite people - Kristina and my daughter.

Two of my very favorite people – Kristina and my daughter.

16 thoughts on “An update

  1. Damnit damnit damnit…and let me throw in a great big AW FUCK too.

    Well..she’ll take this and make it her own. They’ll be begging her to stay because they’ll fall in love with her just like we did.

    Thanks so much for the update. This just sucks so much.

  2. Hey Robin, thanks for the update. Hope for the best, prepare for the worst, right? She’ll get through this, you will too. Dump your shit whenever you need, she’d understand. Kristina’s friends are our friends.
    Love the pix! Stop by the Running on Sober blog sometime–KC participated in the Life in 6 Songs series a few weeks back, you’d probably enjoy her post.
    Take care, and thanks again,

  3. Thanks Robin – I actually found what you said very appropriate and insightful. You can share whenever you want – we’re all here for you, D, and of course Kristina. I appreciate you updating us…very much appreciated, and glad to know that she went through with it with the grace and strength that she has shown all along.

    I too love the picture. Thanks again for doing this.


  4. My heart goes out to her, I hope that it strengthens her, and lets her realize that she can get through anything. I’m glad that she has a friend like you (well from the sounds of it many friends) there for her.

    Well, if you feel like you have many more things you want to say, may I suggest that there’s the an easy solution to that conundrum: How do you feel about making a blog of your own? 🙂
    That way you’ll have a place where if you have feelings you want to share about what you transcribe for Kristina, and don’t have to feel restricted in how much you put down of your own thoughts.

    • Edit– Oh never mind, silly me, you do have a blog. XP
      (I found it on another post, I clearly didn’t click the link. XP Sorry! )
      Perhaps you could link it here when you update, like “for my thoughts go –>” kinda thing. 🙂

  5. I’m sad to hear the sentence is what she expected. You are a good friend. Thanks for the update. Take care,

  6. I can only say what has already been said. Thanks for the update it is much appreciated! I will keep her in my thoughts and hope the time goes by quickly for her.

  7. Share as you need to, updates on her and your emotions. Thank you for giving us this perspective and update.

  8. You’re all fantastic – thank you so much for your kind words, and for all the kindness and love you continue to give Kristina. I’m going to add a p.s. to the letter I’m sending her tomorrow to let her know about all of the comments. I’m sure it’ll do her heart good to know.

  9. I am so so sorry to hear the outcome of the sentencing. It seems so punitive and pointless to jail someone who has fully acknowledged her actions and made such dramatic changes to her life for the better. There has to be a better way to work a justice system than this. Lots and lots of love to Kristina. I hope she finds her way through this with all the strength and the courage she has already shown herself so capable of. MTM. xxx

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